Would You Rather?

Would you rather be able to run like a cheetah, but have an uncontrollable urge to chase cars
OR
Swim like a dolphin, but smell like a fish?

Would you rather speak every thought that pops into your mind
OR
Have one arm that hates the rest of your body and is desperately trying to escape?

Would you rather shoot fire from your nose whenever you sneeze.
OR
Have springs for teeth and when you bite down it goes BOING!

Would you rather chew your food with your armpits
OR
Smell with your nipples?

Would you rather have x-ray vision but an uncontrollable lazy eye
OR
The ability to fly but only while singing “It’s raining men.”

Would you rather look like Brad Pitt but talk like Gilbert Gottfried
OR
Look like Tom Cruise but have the personality of Tom Cruise?

Would you rather have the head of a human and the body of a sheep
OR
Have the head of a sheep and the body of a human (who is in ridiculously good shape)?

Would you rather have grass for hair and have to get your haircuts from a herd of goats
OR
Have cymbals for eyelids that crash every time you blink?

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